If I ever meet Bill Gates and/or Steve jobs in a dark alley.... by Harvey Wallbanger (the Testy Technologist)
If I ever meet Bill Gates and/or Steve jobs in a dark alley....
 by Harvey Wallbanger (the Testy Technologist)
 Friday, February 19th, 2010
 New York, NY
 Views: 12,042
 
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If I ever meet Bill Gates in an alley some dark night, I'm going to punch him right in the mouth. Hopefully he'll be with Steve Jobs so I can smack the crap out of them both.

As a technologist for more than 15 years, I've had a love/hate relationship with Microsoft and Apple. I always wait until service pack 2 from Microsoft before upgrading to their latest Operating System (or OS as we call it in Nerdspeak) and I never get the first version of anything Apple puts out. I prefer to let the unwashed masses waste their money on buggy products and software that crashes, waiting until a stable version or release is available.

A few years back I got my first Mighty Mouse when I picked up an Apple G5 monster box for video editing and audio production. At first I hated the pernicious little piece of hardware, having difficulty using the vague 'right click' function built into it. It was a welcome change from the big stupid clown button on previous Apple mice so I persevered until I eventually got the hang of using both mouse buttons.

A second Mighty mouse came with my Intel Mac Mini which I purchased for iPhone development. I was now so used to the Mighty Mouse from Apple, it became my mouse of choice, even going so far as to purchase additional Mighty Meeces for my Sony Vaio laptop and Dell workstation as well.

I recently built out an AMD 64 bit whitebox for development purposes, running Server 2003 64 bit edition and of course I had to have another Mighty Mouse for it, now being accustomed to the smooth scrolling operation and deft 'right click' functionality.

I had been loading Microsoft's software on machines for years, having taught A+ certification in my late 20's, but now in my early 40's I was having difficulty with my new 64 bit machine because it would hang at the Microsoft logo on startup.

Perplexed, I "Googled" the shit out of all the possible issues that could cause the hang on startup problem with my development server. I was pounding my head against the keyboard like Guy Smiley until I found a little posting on a board where someone else was having the same problem with a USB hub they'd plugged into a 64 bit machine.

I unplugged every USB device I had (Mighty Mouse included) and held the power button in to restart my newly built machine. Lo and behold, the goddamned thing booted right up without a hitch. Through trial and error, I added USB devices one by one back onto my machine and it turns out the culprit was my beloved Mighty Mouse!!! (and not the Radio Shack USB hub I had suspected from the beginning).

Now I have to unplug my Mighty Mouse from my server every time I reboot it and when you have to install anything from Adobe (because the install makes you reboot your machine 1000 times) it makes you want to pull out your freaking hair while poking your own eyes with a hot soldering iron.

I am now convinced that Bill Gates personally ordered his developer minions to purposely write Windows to hate anything Apple and now I have proof (or at least validation of my conspiracy theory that Microsoft and Apple hate each other).

Which is why, if I ever run into Bill Gates and/or Steve Jobs in a dark alley...

 

Next week: Why I agree with Steve Jobs that Adobe is lazy...

 


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Last updated by Harvey Wallbanger (the Testy Technologist) - Friday, February 19th, 2010 -  New York, NY

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